It happens all the time. A Caucasian woman marries a Korean man. A blond American student missionary to Japan falls in love with a girl there and brings her home to meet his parents. An Indian student in the United States ties the knot to an Ethiopian classmate or Jason, a Chinese boy in the film ''Sepet,” falls in love with Orked, the Malay girl.

Such intercultural marriages are increasing, and barriers to such unions are decreasing in most areas of the world. But what actually happens in an intercultural marriage? What impact do cross-cultural environmental factors have on such marriage? What about children? What effect do such marriages have on religious experience? What factors can contribute to the success of an interracial marriage?

Despite all the unanswered questions, one may think that this phenomenon is something new. The truth is the intercultural marriage history can be traced back as early as the 15th century whereby it was recorded that the Malay Ruler of Malacca married a princess named Li Po from China in 1445. The generation of ''baba'' and ''nyonya'' that still exist today in Malacca would be the best proof to show how unique the result of the intercultural marriage can be.

From the legal side, it is clear that this type of marriage is given proper recognition and attention. The Law Reform (Divorce and Marriage) Act 1976 and Islamic Family Law Act 1984 provide the laws and regulations governing this matter. Several decided cases such as the case of In Re Maria Huberdina Hertogh (1951) and Chua Mui Nee v. V. Palaniappa (1976) prove that the marriages between different races, religions and cultures are being widely practiced including couples with different background and citizenship. In the case of Martin v. Umi Kalsom, the Court held that the marriage was valid even though the husband was a British domicile.

It is undeniable that only a small number of people seem to be dare enough to choose and practice this type of marriage. For instance , during the period leading up to May 13,1969 when all three major races in Malaysia viewed one another with 'suspicious' and 'fear', interracial relationships were almost a taboo and the few that dared brave the hostility of such times had difficulty trying to survive.Families were horrified when their children married outside their own race and the 'outsiders' were more often than not subjected to initial 'coldness' by their in-laws. History repeats with the occurance of the tragedy of 9/11 when most of the people start eying each other which hostility, hatred and anger.Discrimination between races,cultures and religions slowly seeps into our everyday life despite the unity and harmony that have been promoted for decades.Thus intercultural marriage should be encouraged among the young generation today since it promotes unity and helps to increase the economic growth.

It is argued that the intercultural marriage promotes unity through exposure to different cultures, races, and religious. They are not tied or restricted to one culture, making them more open-minded, tolerable and understanding in dealing with each other and also others. For example, an American-Asian couple will learn about each other's customs and ways of life. It may begin with the simplest things such as how to dress and eat. It then will extend to other things like the suitable manner socialize in the community and methods of raising children .The same situation goes on everyday even though there might be times when they seem have difficulties in accepting and practicing something which is alien to them. According to Romano (2001), they are exposed to the new and different of ways to approach life and solve problems. It simply means that they are given unique and valuable opportunities to develop multi-cultural frames of reference in which they could choose how they want to live their lives. The alternatives are in their own hands and the strict meaning of cultural relativism can be avoided.

Despite the fuss and frown over certain things, in the end they will learn how to understand, respect and appreciate each other. The unity and harmony will be a positive result which can be achieved through the intercultural marriage. Moreover, as Ellina(1997, p.33 ) says about a friend of hers who practices this type of marriage ,

He is fiercely Malay but, despite his strong emotions, he is willing to marry outside his race to better understand a different culture and overcome whatever prejudices he may have against another races.

It is clear that a person with a thick and strong cultural sense of belonging will find it hard not to feel prejudice and uncomfortable with people of other races and cultures. But, there are always ways to set aside those negative elements and one of them is through intercultural marriage itself.

The true meaning of racial integration will also find its place whereby Ellina (1997, p. 32) says :

There would be added depth to the term racial integration when the face of a Malaysian cannot be distinctively Malay, Chinese or Indian but an indistinguishable blend of any of them. Being Malay, Chinese or Indian does not necessarily make one more Malaysian than the other. Being a mixture of the melting pot, however, can accentuate one's Malaysian-ness and bind one more easily to a Bangsa Malaysia, thereby makingthe idea seem more tangible. Perhaps then we can be proud of true unity instead of just unification among the races.

Accordingly, intercultural marriage leads to unity and harmony, binding different people together in a single sense of belonging by just being a Malaysian!

Other than that, intercultural marriage also helps to increase the economic growth of each other's country. For instance, when they exchange trip to each other's hometown and do some shopping together, they are actually contributing to the economic growth. The visit might be for the purpose of getting together with the other families and relatives during those festive seasons or school holidays, but at the same time it may become a tour package especially when they are also bringing other friends and relatives from other places to join the gathering. Moreover, the difference in currencies exchange will certainly bring more benefit especially for a developing country like Malaysia. Surely, some of them will be attracted by the low prices of goods being sold here besides lots of interesting places to be visited, drawing them to be here again in the future.

Besides that, the bicultural advantages that they possess such as the bicultural features from their mixed parentage and also the ability to communicate in many languages will give them higher “market value” in getting better employments and salaries. As Purushotam (2004, p. 90) mentions:

Many Indian men have actually confessed to me that they consciously selected women from the Chinese community because they did not want children who were dark skinned. Many legitimated their position by saying that the economic and social life of a darker-skinned person was, after all, more difficult in the worlds they lived in.

It is important to note how some people deliberately choose to practice intercultural marriage just to ensure that their children will get the best in their lives, learning from their own hard experience.

While according to Narayanan (1993, p.33) the mastery of the languages will give a very good bargaining power to that person. It is clear that the prospect of getting good employments and salaries also become wider and broader for those who came from mix-marriage since they can speak and write well in more than one language, making their language proficiency ability more valuable compared to those who only master their own native language. The employer would be happy to have an employee who can entertain local and international clients for the company. Other than that, it also means good news for the company's financial and training departments since he does not need any language course training anymore. Besides that, the unique bicultural features that they have will certainly make them comfortable and confident to be employed in any place, not being prejudiced or discriminated due to their native looks or features. The choice of employment is always open for them, not restricted to racial or geographical borders.

Indeed, it is undeniable that the intercultural marriage does not only contribute economically to the country but also to the persons concerned, highlighting the positive side of this type of marriage, giving it more credit compared to uniracial type of marriage.

Some people might probably claim that intercultural marriage will lead to the loss of one's own unique culture and identity since they are raised and exposed to common and mixed cultures. It means that since the special and unique features of one's own race or culture cannot be practiced and adopted wholly in the daily life, soon it will cease and lose its identity. It is due to the fact that the couple will try to avoid any potential disagreement and dispute in choosing which culture they should follow. Furthermore, the cultures and tradition in which they were brought up would be totally different from each other. According to Prokopchak (1999), the way of doing something by a spouse might draw negative response from another like the way of washing dishes, taking care of clothing or raising and disciplining the children. Thus, it is better to have a way of doing something which is common and known to everyone.

They feel more comfortable to be in a middle position of the cultures, not being in either side so that they will be free from any biasness and prejudice towards others. Moreover as being admitted by Stritof(n.d), “It isn't easy to deal with the legacy that we've all grown up in our ethnic, religious and socio-economic backgrounds''.But, whether thay realize it or not, they are actually setting aside the most valuable and precious element of a race namely culture!Without own culture and tradition, the race or ethnic will lose its uniqueness and specialty. As Purushotam (2004, p.229) states,

This affects inter-ethnic marriages in that marrying someone of another “race” can be seen as a rejection of one's own;a reading that denigrates the ethnicity one is supposed to be a member of.

It simply means that the couple deliberately choose not to follow and upheld the tradition and culture of his own, for instance the Malays use their hands while eating and clothe themselves in baju Melayu and baju Kurung, while the Chinese use chopsticks to eat and wear cheongsam . But for a Malay-Chinese couple, they think it is better to use fork and spoon while eating and to dress in a Western style since both of them do not feel comfortable to insist each other to follow his or her own culture in daily life. Nevertheless, the culture which they think to be common and known to everyone is not a pure one, far from being unique.

The children of the intercultural marriage will also be raised according to the common and agreeable style of parenting of the couple, not tied or restricted to a particular or specific culture.As Romano(2001, p.114) says,

Because they were raised in different countries and cultures,the parents may have not only different but also conflicting models. Parents may find themselves at odds in agreeing upon a clear and consistent pattern for their children. Parents in basic agreement regarding their value system may still find that they emphasize different values while raising their children.The desired and result might be the same,but the route along the way might differ radically.

It reflects that each parents will try to instill his or her own culture but at the same time they cannot disregard the partner's values and styles of bringing up the children. Thus, the children are expected to adopt both styles and cultures despite the differences and disagreements upon certain things. According to Romano (2001) children who were stuck in such situation will have to follow both, regardless of the fact whether it is voluntarily or forcibly done. Most of them seem to be confused and indecisive in choosing which culture they should follow. The loss of one's own unique culture and root will be the end result, being passed by the parents to the young generation.

However,this claim seems baseless because instead of losing own culture,they are actually enriching and expanding the cultures. There is no question as which or whose culture or custom to be followed since both sides are given proper and equal recognition in everyday life. This rare yet unique phenomenon can be seen in Malacca whereby the ''Baba'' and ''Nyonya'', through the mixture of Malay and Chinese custom helps to enrich the cultures of both sides, making them unique and distinctive. As Ellina(1997, p.32) says that, “Nyonyas and Babas are not, and were never, purely Chinese although they are perceived as part of the Chinese race today”. In fact, their culture are the combination of both, being blended and thoroughly mixed with the passing of time.

According to Mohd Bakri Darus (2006), the ''Baba'' and ''Nyonya'' which are also known as ''kaum Peranakan” can speak in both Hokkien and Malay language fluently. Besides using hands to eat, their dishes also quite similar to the Malay's in which they also love eating ''sambal belacan'', ''masak lemak'' and ''asam pedas''. Other than that, the women also clothe themselves in ''sarung'' and ''kebaya'' just like the Malays. Thus, they serve as the best example to show how both cultures and traditions can always sit side by side, being practiced in harmony without any dispute or disagreement among the people.

It is clear that Islam also encourages intercultural marriage. In fact, it is viewed differently in Islam compared to other religions and beliefs worldwide. As Ajijola (1999, p.64) mentions that, '' According to Talmudic laws and Rabbanical code, intermarriage with all gentiles including Christians, was forbidden for the Jews.'' It means that the prospect of marrying someone belonging to other religions, races and cultures is not encouraged. In contrast, Islam promotes and encourages its followers to practice intercultural marriage since it offers many benefits and advantages to us as the Quran states,

O mankind! We created you from a single (pair) of a male and female. And made you into nations and tribes, that you may know each other (not that you may despise each other). Verily the most honoured among you in the sight of Allah is the most righteous. And Allah has full knowledge And is well acquainted (with all things). (Surah al-Hujurat:13)

It is clear that Islam emphasizes the basis that everyone is bound by a single brotherhood regardless of their races, cultures and background. Thus Allah encourages us to mix and get to know each other ( ta'aruf), expanding and spreading the brotherhood to achieve harmony and unity in our life. In addition, an example was also being given by our Prophet Muhammad(s.a.w) himself, who married a foreign wife named Maria al-Qibtiyyah who was an African, proving that Islam promotes intercultural marriage among its followers.

In conclusion, intercultural marriage should be encouranged and promoted especially to the young generation since it brings many benefits,being a tool of unity and harmony besides contributing to the economic growth. As Romano(2001) and Stritof (n.d.) agree that it helps to develop an international identity of the persons concerned, making them feel ''belonged'' to the world, not just to the place of their origin. When Frankie Lane, back in fifties used to sing, “East is east and west is west, our worlds are far apart'', now it is the right time bring the two sides of the world together and intercultural marriage in this sense will be the best tool to get both cultures abridged.

However, there are a few matters that must be given proper attention so as to make things better. For instance, the government should revise the laws and procedures regarding the registration of citizenship of foreign spouses which is quite cumbersome at this moment. According to Narayanan (1993), there are those who already stayed here for 17 years but still have not get their (permanent resident) or PR status. Other than that, foreign spouses also face difficulties to work even though they are qualified workers since the local employments require them to have permit first. Their skills are wasted when the job market is closed to them. Thus, it is important to get these matters solved so that more people will be interested to involve in this type of marriage, towards having a multiracial and tolerable society.

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